Random conversations
by Erik The Viking
Summary: Random oneshots tha are mostly conversaions. Warning RANDOM!
1. Chapter 1

"HI!" Said Percy, hopping on one foot.

"Hi" Replied Nico, "Percy have you had sugar?"

"Uh huh! I ate lots of candy to celebrate getting a Hamster!" Nico choked, then burst out laughing "A Hamster? Out of all the pets in the world you get a _Hamster?_"

Percy ignored him and continued, "He's black, and he keeps slamming his head into the wall, I used to have two, but Barney ate him-"

"_B-Barney_!" Nico spluttered, cutting him off. "

Yes, Barney. Anyways, so barney ate hufflepuff, but then he was still hungry, and he refused to eat the lettuce, I gave him meat and he ate it happily, but turns out he stashed the lettuce underneath his cage" Nico interrupted once again saying "Does he have red eyes?"

"Why yes actually" Percy replied

"Did you find him at a vampire movie?" Asked Nico, looking concerned

"Yes again Nico how did you know?" A confused Percy asked

"Percy I'm afraid you have Bunnicula" Said Nico

"Who?" Percy said, looking incredulous

"You didn't read that book?" Asked Nico, adopting Percy's expression.

"Erm Nico? The longest book I've read was 'Green eggs and ham'" 

"By Dr. Suess? How long did it take you?" asked Nico

"It took me a week and I think that was the author" Said Percy, completely straight faced.

"How old were you?!" Nico questioned, beginning to laugh

"Nine" He said, like it was perfectly normal

"Nine?" Asked Nico, unable to stand up because he was laughing so much

"Yes Nine!" Percy snapped, "I read it with mommy!"

"Are you okay Percy" Asked Nico suddenly, genuinely concerned

"Why yes Nico, why do you ask?" Replied the son of Poseidon

"You seem… un-Percy-like" Was Nico's response, suddenly his features changed to a daughter of Hecate.

"I KNEW IT, I KNEW IT!" Nico shouted joyfully

"Knew what?" The girl asked

"That children of Hecate went to Hogwarts!" Nico said, a grin plastered on his face

"How did you know?" She said, looking shocked

"It's name was Hufflepuff and you used the Poly-juice potion!"

"Oh" She said, looking dejected, then Dumbledore appeared and ate them.


	2. OOC Annabeth FTW!

Annabeth was worried, she had just seen The Hobbit, a movie to one of her all-time favorite books, and now she had to wait another year until the next segment came out. She decided to consult the Oracle about it. She jogged over to Rachel's cave and said "O' Oracle, tell me my destiny" Rachel looked at her, screamed then sprinted out the door. Annabeth chased her, but accidentally slammed into a tree. She fell asleep and dreamed about Ponies. When she awoke, a strange man was standing over her.

"Who are you?" She asked

"I am Thorin leader of-" Annabeth screaming in a fan girl fashion cut him off. "Sing me the song!" She shouted, squealing.

"Well, if you insist

_Narwhales, Narwhales _

_Swimming in the ocean" _

"No not that song silly" She interrupted "The misty mountain song!"

"OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" He yelled unnecessarily then began:

_Far __over the misty mountains cold,_

_To dungeons deep, and caverns old._

_We must away, ere break of day._

_To find our long forgotten gold_

_The pines were roaring on the height._

_The winds were moaning in the night._

_The fire was red, it flaming spread._

_The trees like torches blazed with light._

Suddenly a Gorilla jumped down from a tree, Strange Annabeth thought Gorillas don't go in trees so it must just be an overgrown Caterpillar. That seemed plausible, so she gave it no more thought. Just then Smog attacking, Thorin ran around screaming like a little girl, then his ear got snagged on a branch and turned out it _was_ a little girl in a Thorin costume. Annabeth laughed and started dancing to Cotton Eyed Joe.


	3. Chiron meets a door

**HelloPeopleofepicnessthischapterhasOOCChroninit!**

* * *

One day Chiron was walking along, thinking about goats. Suddenly he ran into something, a door.

"OW!" The door yelled.

Chiron looked at it with wonder. "You can talk! Like a hyper chipmunk!"

"I am THE hyper chipmunk silly horse!" The door replied angrily.

"I'm not a horse!" Chiron said, crying.

"I'M SO SORRY! DON'T CRY! I KNOW THAT YOU'RE A POSSUM!" The door responded, panicked.

"You're the fist person to ever realize!" Said Chiron, no longer crying.

"That's because-" The door was cut off by a piano falling from the sky.

"LOOK A FREIGHT TRAIN!" The door said excitedly.

"IT'S NOT A FREIGHT TRAIN! IT'S A BANANA WEARING A HAT!"

"FREIGHT TRAIN!"

"BANANA!"

"FREIGHT TRAIN!"

"BANANA!"

"FREIGHT TRAIN!"

"BANANA!"

"FREIGHT TRAIN!"

"BANANA!"

"FREIGHT TRAIN!"

"BANANA!"

"FREIGHT TRAIN!"

"BANANA!"

"FREIGHT TRAIN!"

"BANANA!"

"FREIGHT TRAIN!"

"BANANA!"

"FREIGHT TRAIN!"

"BANANA!"

"FREIGHT TRAIN!"

"BANANA!"

"FREIGHT TRAIN!"

"BANANA!"

"FREIGHT TRAIN!"

"BANANA!"

"SSSSAAAACCCCAAGGGAAAWWWWEEEEAAA!"

"SSSPPPPPAAAAARRRRRTTTTTTAAAAA!"

"NNNNAAAARRRRRNNNIIIIIAAAAA!"

"SSSTTTTTUUUUUFFFFFFF!"

"Dude, why are we yelling?" The door asked.

"Because of the sparkles." Chiron responded.

"Oh, that makes sense."

Then everything exploded EXCEPT for Chiron and the door.

"FIREWORKS!" The door yelled.

"Have you ever met a green T-rex named Zach who ate six bananas then turned into a sheep?" Chron asked after a while.

"Of course! Who hasn't?" The door responded.

"Bob the titan." Chiron replied pityingly.

"That's sad" Said the door.

"Sadder than a dancing turtle who explodes around houses." Chiron whispered, looking at a red beetle that was imploding then exploding.

"Are you my mother?" The door asked.

"Are you my father?" Chiron asked.

"No, Leroy is." Responded the door.

" HOW DID YOU KNOW!" Chiron yelled back, fainting.

"I am a psychotic psychic." The door replied, helping the Centaur back up.

"Cool. Want to go get Ice cream?" Chiron asked randomly.

"Dude, I'm a door." The door said.

"You are?" Chiron asked, inspecting it.

"Yup." The door responded, pushing Chiron off itself.

"I didn't know that." Chiron said.

"Most people don't." The door said, looking sad.

Just then an old man walked past. "Look a door!" He said, and then turned into a camel.

"Bye-bye." The camel said, then teleported away.

Then the world imploded.

* * *

**ThischapterisWEIRD!IAMSLIGHTLYHYPERIFYOUCAN'TTELL: D**


	4. A really weird chapter

Katie sat in the camp senate meeting, pondering why pillows were so _soft._ Why couldn't they be made of steel? It would be so much better.

Suddenly Zeusy Poopy came running through screaming "RANDOM ZOMBIE ATTACK!"

Then he ran into some cheese and disappeared in to 18.75556 feathers.

"OMG! IT'S MR FLUBBLEPANTS!" Clarisse yelled running over to the feathers and repeatedly slammed her head into the floor.

"REALLY!?" Connor asked smelling the feathers. "NO THEY'RE NOT!" H yelled, then promptly ate Clarisse's head off.

"THIS IS ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING!" He said, then everybody started eating her.

Then Ares appeared, and everybody expected him to pulverize them for eating his daughter but he just ate her too.

Then magical llamas stampeded the camp, and suddenly, a rainbow appeared!

But then the rainbow morphed into a T-rex! Everyone was sad, it was going to eat them, but it just danced to Gangnam Style, and said it's name was Bob. The demigods danced with bob until Leo jumped off a neon cloud!

"He's gonna DIEEEEEEE!" Said Mrs. Hippo. But he didn't die! He yelled 'Flame on!' And started flying! Then he came down and ate an orange peanut!

After this, they all watched Harry Potter Puppet pals on a mushroom! It was AWESOME!

Then the minotaur emerged from the mushroom then ate some grass! Then he disappeared, and everyone was all sad and stuff.

"Peanut butter!" yelled Tyson as he rode in from Antartica on Rainbow the Fish Pony.

And then, with a blinding flash of light all of the Olympians (Zeus and Ares included) arrived with great epicness.

"AHHHHHHHHH" They yelled.

"AHHHHHHHHH" Everyone else yelled.

"WHY ARE WE YELLING AHHHHHHH?" Screamed Will Treaty.

"Because of pasta!" Explained Halt.

"I like buttons," Said Alyss quietly.

"Aren't you dead?" Asked Will

"The Royal Ranger hasn't happened yet." Halt explained yet again.

"Yeah well, So is you face." Replied Horace.

Then the author of this story remembered that the Olympians are still just awkwardly standing there and wrote about them.

Aphrodite farted 12 times straight, licking a lampshade.

Then, Thalia's tree started twirling around! And Bessie decided to eat the crazy daisies like a shoe! Unfortunately, stuff happened.

"OH NO! I HATE WHEN STUFF HAPPENS!" Frank Zhang yelled.

"Yeah, well, so is your face." Replied Horace.

"UNICORNS!" Athena shouted, looking at her nose.

"I EAT UNIICONS FOR BREAKFAST!" Mr. Slowly said.

"Yeah well, So is you face." Replied Horace.

Then the zombie apocalypse happened.


End file.
